


Hal is a Complete Moron

by barryallenisravenclaw



Category: DCU (Comics), Green Lantern (Comics), The Flash (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cute, Hal is Dumb, Hogwarts AU, Light Angst, M/M, all the lanterns, but theyre only at school for the first bit, pretty cute imo, ralph is there for a second, then they go to central, well all the human ones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-06-23
Packaged: 2019-12-31 22:57:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18323675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barryallenisravenclaw/pseuds/barryallenisravenclaw
Summary: It all started when Barry told Hal about this girl he liked from back home. Well, Hal is not the best at covering for secret emotions, and therefore told Barry to go after this girl back home because of course she would like him back, who wouldn't? I mentioned how stupid he is, didn't I? Now, Hal is supposed to go back to Central City with him for Spring Break to help him land a girl. What could possibly go wrong?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! There should be updates every Tuesday until I'm done. If I finish writing earlier than expected, I'll just put the whole thing up then! Fingers crossed!

Hal could not believe how phenomenally stupid he was. He seemed even more stupid because his own stupidity was pointed out to him by someone else before he noticed how stupid he was. Now that he realized what he had done, he was amazed that anyone could be as completely, irreversibly, monumentally stupid as he was being.

"Hey, man, it's not all bad." John was trying to comfort him with lies. It wouldn't work. Now that Hal knew how stupid he was, there was no going back to the blissful ignorance he had previously enjoyed.

"It's pretty bad, Johnny." Guy was right. John glared at him.

"It doesn't matter how bad it is," John continued. "All that matters is what you do about it now."

"I love him, John!" Hal yelled. He couldn't take it anymore, he needed to make them understand how royally screwed he was. "Don't you guys get how awful this is?"

His friends all shook their heads.

"Ok, let me set the scene here." Hal was going to have to spell it out for them. "I have known Barry since we started at Hogwarts. We have been friends since he sat down in my compartment on the train ride here, out of breath because he was late. We have helped each other on our homework, talked about our problems, gotten detention for fighting bullies, cried, fought, laughed, and lived together for the last five years. We came out to each other as bi as soon as each of us realized because we have no secrets. Are you following me here?"

Everyone nodded. Simon looked a little confused. "I don't get it. You both like dudes, you're friends, where's the problem?"

Hal sighed dramatically. "The problem is that, like a complete fool, I just told Barry he should ask out this girl from back home."

Katma stared at him like he'd grown another eye. "Why in the name of Merlin's grumpy galoshes would you do that?"

"Because, Kat, I'm an idiot," Hal answered calmly.

"You're not an idiot, Jordan, you're just dense," Katma continued. "Anyone with a brain could tell you were in love with the boy."

"Well obviously Hal didn't know, so shut up!" Hal facepalmed and John hit Guy for saying that.

"Man, what's wrong with you?"

"What, he didn't! I'm helping!"

"I'm sorry, Hal, I shouldn't have said anything," Jessica piped up. "I just happened to overhear Barry saying he liked Iris and I thought..."

"You thought I would be upset because I'm so obviously head over heels for that little nerd," Hal finished. "You were right, I just didn't know why I was upset."

"How do you not know you're in love with someone?" Simon asked.

"I don't know, I thought it was normal? I've always thought about him like that!" Hal stopped when he realized what he said and blushed. "That's not what I meant. I just..." he sighed. "I've always been kind of nervous and fluttery and happy when I'm around him. I just figured that was how friendship was with him."

Katma rolled her eyes. "Merlin, you're dumb."

"I know!"

"So," John cut back in. He was always good at being the voice of reason. "Barry said he likes Iris, and you told him to ask her out. Then, Jessica pointed out that you're in love with him. You need to convince him not to ask out Iris now, right? That way you won't suffer by seeing them together?"

Hal sighed. "It's not that simple. If he likes her, I want him to be happy and he can be happy if he asks her out."

"What if he only likes her because he thinks he can't have you?" Hal's head snapped up at Kilowag's words.

"But h-how would I know?" Hal stuttered. "How would I know if he liked me back?"

His friends all shrugged. Hal groaned. "You're no help. I'm going to talk to Diana."

Sadly, Hal couldn't talk to Diana right that minute because it was time for astronomy. The Gryffindor and Ravenclaw seventh years of his friend group had been killing time before class because they shared that class together. This also meant that Barry was in it with them. Hal made his friends promise they wouldn't embarrass him. Kilowag refused to promise.

Hal left Katma and John to flirt behind him as the four of them walked to class, their actions only serving to make Hal feel worse about himself. He really did like Barry. The way he laughed with his eyes. How he always knew the answers in Potions because he was just that big of a nerd. The fact that he had magicked his school ties into bow ties. Mostly, Hal loved how nice Barry was to everyone, even the people he didn't like or who didn't like him. Barry was the whole wonderful package and Hal was a mess because of it.

He sighed. Maybe he should just not talk to Barry until this whole thing blew over.

"Hal!" Or not. "Where were you, I missed you after dinner!"

Hal forced a grin as his best friend came running down the hall at him. "Hey, Bear! Sorry, I had a Creatures essay to finish for Professor Crandall. Three feet on bowtruckles, can you believe it?"

Barry chuckled as he fell into step with Hal. "That's Crandall for you. He spent a day on manticores but he'll talk for months about nifflers and kneezles."

"I worry about that man, I can't imagine he gets out much."

"I don't think any of the professors get out much."

"Touché." Hal was grinning as he said it, and Barry was grinning back at him. Even his eyes were smiling. It made Hal want to hug him to death. Mostly, he was happy that Barry's smile was directed at him.

The boys fell into a comfortable silence after that, ascending the ladder into the astronomy tower with Kilowag, John, and Soranik close behind. This time, they were trying to keep their distance.

Hal took his usual seat next to Barry at the front of the room and grinned at his friend. Astronomy was easily his favorite class. It was also a place where he and Barry had a lot of fun because not only did science and witchcraft intersect here, so did Barry's love of science with Hal's love of flying. They had some of their best memories studying star charts together late into the night.

"So what are you going to do over Easter holiday?" Barry's voice broke through Hal's reverie as easily as it always did. They had arrived to class early for once.

Hal waved at Diana and J'onn as they walked past. "You know, the usual. Mom doesn't care if I come home. I figured I'd just hang here with Bruce and J'onn." Barry smacked Hal's arm, making him yelp. "Ow! What the hell was that for?"

"For assuming you can't come home with me," Barry quickly explained. "Sorry, I was just a little surprised. You were with me last year, what makes this year any different?"

Hal shrugged. "I dunno, I thought you might be a bit busy."

"Hal." Something in his voice made Hal look up at his best friend. There was a kind but concerned smile there that stole Hal's breath away. "I'll never be too busy for you."

Hal turned away before Barry could see him blushing. "Yeah, man, I know that. I'll tell Mom and the brothers I'm with you guys again this year. She probably forgot Hogwarts even has an Easter break, huh?" He chuckled a little as a cover and was rewarded with a matching chuckle from Barry. They both understood the complexities of being a half-blood wizard.

Class started, and Hal almost forgot about their conversation. Almost, and he probably would have, if not for the butterflies in his stomach and the quick beating of his heart. That was going to be an interesting week.

When Professor Scott released them to work with the telescopes, Hal hastily scribbled a note to Diana and spelled it across the room.

I need to talk to you about a problem I created for myself. Promise you won't laugh at me but also please help me dear God I'm so lost. --Hal

He really hoped she wouldn't laugh at him too much.

"What was that?" Barry asked. Crap, Hal didn't think he had seen that.

"Wouldn't you like to know," he answered, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows. Barry rolled his eyes and turned to their shared telescope. They were fairly quiet as they worked, which Hal was grateful for as he was currently quite a mess and would have been hard pressed to make conversation.

"Anything new in Central City I should know about?" Or, maybe he was fine. Huh.

Barry shrugged. "My mom bought new carpeting last week. You should probably compliment it. My dad is trying to convince her that he needs a new car, so maybe stay out of that argument if it comes up."

Hal laughed. "I miss Nora..."

"She misses you too, don't worry," Barry grinned back. "In her last owl she asked about you, she wanted to know how you were doing."

"I should write her more," Hal mumbled, vaguely ashamed.

Barry's answering laugh was so good-natured, it made Hal's heart hurt. How could one guy be so... perfect?

After class, Hal found himself walking Barry back to Ravenclaw Tower. As usual, his chivalry was both completely accidental and misunderstood. Barry answered the riddle, gave him a quick one-armed hug, and slipped through the doorway, taking Hal's heart with him.

Hal suddenly felt very tired. Why the hell had he agreed to spend Easter with Barry? He could already tell that it was going to be a disaster. How did he expect to survive constant contact for a week with the object of his affections if he can barely survive one class period? To put it shortly, Hal's goose was well and truly cooked. He really needed to talk to Diana.


	2. Chapter 2

Three days later, he still hadn't talked to her. Between his quidditch planning and her quidditch practice, they had almost no free time. Add to that the fact that Diana usually avoided him at all costs, and the result was one stressed out Gryffindor bisexual.

"Jordan? You wished to speak with me with regards to a mistake?" Hal jumped about a foot in the air and sparks flew out of his wand.

"Jesus, Diana!" His heart was racing, but that didn't stop him from processing what she had just announced to the entire transfiguration hallway. They were getting more than a few stares and snickers. "Don't just yell like that!"

Diana raised an eyebrow. "Who is Jesus? I was simply attempting to get your attention."

Hal glared at her and she giggled. "You didn't have to say it for everyone to hear."

"Why not?" She said, crossing her arms haughtily. "Half the school already knows."

"They do?!" The sentence came out a bit louder than Hal wanted, so he abruptly pulled Diana into an empty classroom. “God, Diana, I had no idea I was being so obvious. You gotta help me with Barry.”

Diana tilted her head. “Barry? What about Barry?”  
Hal stared at her. “You know. My thing. About Barry.”

Her eyes widened almost comically. “Mighty Aphrodite, do you like Barry?”

“Yes! That’s what we’re talking about!”

“No, we’re talking about how you failed your last transfiguration exam and therefore you need me as a tutor.”

Hal would have laughed if he weren’t so overwhelmingly anxious. “That’s definitely not what I need help with.”  
“So you didn’t fail the last exam?” "What? I mean, yes, I failed it, but I’m definitely not here to ask you to tutor me.” Hal sighed and rubbed his chin. “I’m in love with Barry.”  
Diana grinned and clasped his shoulders dramatically. “Congratulations! Bruce owes me a sickle.”

“No! Not congratulations, feel sorry for me!” She dropped his shoulders and he took the opportunity to back away from her a few steps and hug himself. “I’m a human garbage fire, I’m not allowed to like boys like him, much less expect him to like me back.”

“Harold, you are not a dumpster fire.”

“Garbage fire,” Hal corrected.

“You are not that, either.” The Ravenclaw guided Hal to a desk and sat him down. “Despite the fact that you failed to turn a mouse into a teacup, that you lost to Hufflepuff in the last match, and that you—“

“Is this supposed to make me feel better?”

“Despite your many failings,” Diana talked over him, “Barry enjoys your friendship. He has told me before that your camaraderie is of great comfort to him when he is having a bad day. He cares deeply about you in a way that cannot be ruined by your feelings for him, no matter what his might be in return.”

Hal hugged himself harder and looked down at his lap. “I don’t think I could stand it if he doesn’t like me back. He’s my best friend, Diana. I can’t loose that.”

“And you will not, no matter what happens.” 

Hal groaned, remembering his mistake from three days prior. “It’s worse than you think, Di. He invited me home with him for Easter. I don’t think I can cover my feelings that completely.”

“I don’t see the issue. Just don’t go home with him.”

Hal winced. “I already said yes. Even worse, he told me about this girl he likes from back home, and I told him to go for it."

The light smack on his arm was well-deserved. “Hal Jordan, you are a fool. I must renege on my previous statement, it would seem you are a garbage fire after all.”

Hal stood from the desk, pushing his chair over in his haste and indignation. “Hey, if wanted this kind of pep talk, I would have talked to Bruce.”

“There, you see?” Diana smiled. “I have brought you out of your pathetic stupor. Now you can prepare for your self-wrought hades properly and with bravery. I would wish you good luck, but I know that you do not need it in order to succeed.”

Hal smiled back self-deprecatingly. “Could you wish me luck anyway? Just to be on the safe side.”

“Godspeed, Jordan,” she surprised him with a hug. “All will be well.” With that, the wonderful woman walked back into the corridor, leaving Hal alone with his thoughts in a disused history room.

“I’m going to die in Central City,” he told the maps on the wall. The maps did not argue.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning, I spit this one up into two parts because it was getting a bit long. Thanks for reading!

Hal spent the next few days not mentally preparing for his stint as Barry's houseguest, as he probably should have. Instead, he decided to push all of his problems doubt down deep into his soul, ignore them, and then cry about it at night. His roommates all said this was a terrible idea, Guy especially told him to "knock it the fuck off, you pansy." Hal, however, thought he was dealing fairly well with the fact that he was deeply, irrevocably, some would say tragically, in love with his best friend.

The morning on which they would leave for Easter holiday, Barry walked up to Hal in the Great Hall wearing the most adorable grin Hal had ever seen. He still had no idea how the hell he was going to get through this.

"Hey Hal, you all excited for Easter holiday?" Barry asked.

"Oh you know me, Bar, I'm always ready to have a good time." Barry's giggle at this response was expected but nonetheless far too endearing for Hal's current state of mind.

"My mom is extra excited, she's already decided to make your favorite scalloped potatoes for Easter dinner," Barry said.

"Classic Nora," Hal replied wistfully. "She's too perfect for this world."

Barry raised an eyebrow. "Laying it on a little thick, there, don't you think?"

"Jealous?" Hal picked up the lighter ends of his trunk and Barry's, dragging them outside into the corridor to be picked up by the house elves.

"That's the word," Barry said with a small smile. Hal's stomach flipped and he blushed.

"So, uh, got anything planned for us?" He said, clearing his throat. "I mean, we do have a whole week. We can get into all sorts of trouble." Hal wiggled his eyebrows for effect and Barry blushed a little back. Hal was too busy panicking to notice.

"Well, there is one thing you absolutely have to do while you're there," Barry said. Hal could hear a lot of hope in the little guy's voice and had no idea what it was for. "I want you to meet Iris."

Oh, right.

Hal plastered on a grin. "Of course! How could I miss meeting the girl who's stolen my little Barry's heart? I have to approve of her before this whole thing goes any further, young man."

"Good. If you don't like her, I'm not sure I can go through with it." Barry laughed outright as they walked with the rest of the class to the train station in Hogsmede. Diana walked by with Clark and gave Hal a doubting eyebrow raise. Hal resolutely ignored her.

"Barry, if you like her then she has to be great," he reassured his friend, like a fool. He really needed to stop putting his foot in his mouth.

"Thanks, Hal. It means a lot to know you've got my back." Barry's grin made Hal sick, so he changed the subject with a quick "Of course, pal." They spent the rest of their walk talking about school, finding Oliver and Dinah just as they entered the town.

Hal's other best friend had spent the last week hearing Hal "bitch about the blond" without pause, which probably made him a little reluctant to share a cabin with the two of them all the way home. It wasn't that Oliver didn't care about Hal's happiness, he knew that. Hal also knew that he hadn't stopped talking about Barry to anyone and everyone since he realized he was in love with him, and by this point it had to be annoying the shit out of people.

It was decided, by Dinah because she said that she didn't get to see Barry enough, that they would share a cabin as far as Starling City, where she and Oliver had to depart the train. Hal didn't really care who they sat with, he'd be a mess either way. Just before the train started moving, John and Katma joined their group, confirming the possibility that Hal was going to be not-so-subtly teased for the entirety of the train ride.

"So, Hal, you have any plans for Easter holiday?" Dinah asked with a smirk.

"Actually, he's coming back with me again," Barry said with a smile.

Dinah smiled back just as prettily, and Hal resisted the urge to glare daggers at her. Ollie snickered behind his hand. "Really? I had no idea. Sounds fun."

"I'm pretty excited," Barry continued, "there's a few muggle friends I want him to meet. My mom wants to see him again, too, of course. He's so much more polite around her than he is with me..."

"He's the same way with my mom," Oliver said, giving Hal an apparent reprieve. "Merlin knows why, she's one of the worst people I know."

"Yeah, but she can buy us stuff," Hal counters with a grin. "I'm a sucker for free maid service and a 24 hour, fully staffed kitchen."

"Barry," Katma interrupted, "did you say 'again'? Did Hal stay with you last year?"

Barry grinned. "Yeah, and at Christmas last year, too. We have a lot of fun over breaks."

"It sure seems like it," John muttered.

"What about you guys?" Hal covered loudly. "Kat, you staying with John?"

She huffed. "I wish. His parents are so strict, they won't let us be in the same building alone, let alone overnights. They don't seem to realize that we're in Ravenclaw Tower together every night and I haven't gotten pregnant yet."

John coughed and turned bright red. Katma just laughed at her own joke and smiled at her boyfriend.

"I hear that," Dinah said. "That's why I always have to go to Ollie's. My dad is a muggle cop. You guys are lucky," she added gesturing at Barry and Hal and making the latter blush in panic, "you can do whatever you want."

Barry shrugged, puzzled. "I mean I guess. It doesn't really matter, though."

"You guys wanna play a game?" Hal asked suddenly. "We could play The Game. It's always fun." He had to suggest an option quickly, otherwise he might have gotten sucked into FMK by the bunch of well-meaning, back-biting, so-called friends of his.

The group agreed, and they proceeded to play their weird, dice-less version of Dungeons and Dragons until the train stopped at Starling. They said their goodbyes to Dinah and Ollie, the kids themselves not hesitating to wink at Hal before their departure. John said he was bored of the game and took a nap, which was soon interrupted by the arrival of Simon and Jessica in their cabin. They didn't mean to be loud, they were just terrible at being quiet.

After another twenty minutes of dodging thinly-veiled jokes at his expense, interrupted only by the trolley-witch and a few pumpkin pasties, Hal decided he had had enough. He told the group he needed to stretch his legs and walked out into the corridor. It really had been getting a bit stuffy in there.

It was times like these that Hal wondered why he bothered having friends. They would just stab him in the back eventually. He heaved a dramatic sigh as he paused at the door between cars, leaning on the wall of luggage as he contemplated his abysmal situation. Barry was clearly very excited for this week, and Hal would be dammed if he took that from him. He may be shit at hiding his feelings, but he would try his best if it meant his best friend's happiness.


	4. Chapter 4

With newfound resolve, Hal returned to their cabin to find that even more people where there than when he left. Jessica and Simon had left, but Ralph Dibney, one of Barry's friends who also lived in Central City, had joined them and so had Diana and Bruce. Their train ride was the longest as they had to ride all the way down to the capital and it took all day with all the stops, so they both liked to walk around and talk to different groups while they waited. Today, though, Hal knew why they were there. He wasn't too jazzed about having two nosy detectives in his spot.

"Hey, guys, what did I miss?" Hal asked, spreading his arms wide. 

"Hey, Hal!" Ralph exclaimed. "We were just talking about you!"

Barry turned to look at his friend, so Hal couldn't see his face. He imagined it was a lot like the glare he was giving Diana. "Really? I gotta say, it's not all that surprising. I'm a great conversation topic."

"I wouldn't say 'great,'" Bruce muttered. Hal nearly cried in relief; he had an ally against the teasing! He'd almost forgotten how much Bruce hated talking about Hal unless he was berating him.

"Nonsense," Hal countered. "I'm clearly the most interesting person here. Bow and quiver at the sight of my greatness!"

Barry rolled his eyes and smiled. "Ollie left, remember? There's no one here to appreciate the archery puns."

It was at that moment that Hal realized why Diana was looking so smug in the corner. She had situated Bruce, Ralph, and herself so that the only open space to sit was about half a seat directly next to Barry. These cabins were made for six people, but there were seven now that Hal had returned.

"Jordan?" Diana asked sweetly. "Aren't you going to sit with us and talk a while?"

"Can't, doll," he replied with a wink, "somebody took up all the seats."

"Oh, come on, there's room right next to me," Ralph said helpfully. Hal just barely resisted the urge to glare at him as the ginger kid gestured to the space between himself and Barry.

"You sure?" Hal asked weakly. "I wouldn't want to squish you."

"Hal, come on, just sit down," Barry implored. "We were in the middle of my round of Twenty Questions and if you don't sit soon, I'll forget my answer."

Hal sighed. "If you're sure." The group continued their game as he took his seat, practically attached to Barry's right side. He couldn't think straight, not with this much of a physical connection. Sure, they would hug and stuff, they were best friends, but rare was the occasion on which they would be pressed together this tightly. Hal's entire left side felt like it was molten chocolate. Hal crossed his legs. He had no idea what was happening around him until Barry suddenly moved his arm up and around Hal's shoulders to poke Ralph.

"Hey, Bozo, it's your turn to think of something," Barry said. His face was inches from Hal's and Hal was frozen.

Ralph turned around to look at Barry, affronted. "You dare mock me, your only redheaded friend? Good sir, I am offended! And anyway, it'd be Hal's turn next, if we're still going counterclockwise."

Barry looked at Hal, then, and Hal was compelled to look back. The perfect sky blue of Barry's eyes caught and held him there like he was nothing. Barry still had his arm around him, and it was settling in now. He realized Barry was talking and took a guess as to what he was saying as he gave his answer.

"Right, my thing! Uh, let's see here, what are the categories again?"

Katma rolled her eyes. "Animal, vegetable, or mineral."

"Right, right, let me think," Hal muttered. He tore his eyes away from Barry to stare at his shoes. God, he was dying. If he didn't get out of this spot soon, he was going to melt completely into a Hal-sized puddle of stupidity and repressed emotion. He couldn't think of anything except Barry, so he just told them he was ready.

"Is it an animal?" John asked. Hal nodded. Barry, it was.

"Is it a mammal?" Barry asked. Hal nodded again.

"Does it have fur?" Katma asked. Hal shrugged and said yes.

"Is it bigger than a breadbox?" Ralph asked. Hal laughed lightly and told him yes.

"Can I put it in my mouth?" Diana said sweetly. Hal's eyes widened all the way and he blushed up to his hairline.

"Uh, not the whole thing." Katma snickered and Hal didn't even muster the energy to glare at her.

"Is it an herbivore?" Barry asked, completely oblivious. Hal shook his head.

Ralph made an odd noise of surprise, making Hal look up at him. He saw the younger kid's nose twitch before he winked at Hal and looked away. Barry, unfortunately, did not fail to notice that.

"Ralph? Have you got it?"

"I've got something, but I'm not entirely sure what it is. Hal? Is it a person?"

Hal swallowed thickly. "Yeah." He should have stopped there, but Hal was always an idiot. "Now you have to guess who."

Bruce rolled his eyes from the opposite corner. He still hadn't guessed anything, but Hal assumed he was transparent enough that Bruce had figured it out at Diana's last question at least.

"Do we know them personally?" John said. Hal nodded.

"Are they Gryffindor?" Ralph asked. Hal shook his head.

"Slytherin?" No.

"Ravenclaw?" Yes.

"Seventh year?" Yes.

"It's Barry," Bruce said with such finality that he rose from his seat. "Diana, we haven't gone to see Arthur yet. We should go."

"Wait, I have to know if you were right," Diana said sarcastically.

Hal faked a grin and sat up a bit more. Barry moved his arm back down between them, making it harder for Hal to smile. "Yep, you got me! It's hard to think of something else when I'm about to spend a week with the guy." He purposely did not look at his best friend until Diana stood up and he could slide away from Barry a little.

"Well done, Bruce," Katma said dryly. Bruce grunted back before leaving the cabin. Diana waved and made eye contact with Hal before following him.

"I gotta say, I probably wouldn't have gotten that," Barry said with a chuckle. "You old softie, picking me."

Hal stared in disbelief. How could one man be this oblivious. "Yeah, that's me, a softie." Ralph coughed behind him and John covered his smile. Hal recrossed his legs.

The five of them continued their game until they hit Central, then it was time for the guys to disembark. They said goodbye to everyone they passed on their way off the train, and to Ralph when he saw his muggle girlfriend waiting for him after they crossed the barrier. It didn't take long to spot Mrs Allen after that.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the short update! I'm trying to have it finished before I go on vacation, but you all know how that goes. Fingers crossed!

"Boys!" They whipped around just in time to be crushed in a hug by the shorter blond woman. "Oh, my babies, I missed you!"

Hal had always felt welcomed by Nora, ever since she made him cupcakes for his birthday in first year. She had to send three owls to get them all to Hogwarts. He had to say, though, he was consistently caught off guard when it came to her greetings. He wasn't expecting to get such an immensely warm welcome that it nearly knocked him to the ground.

"Oh, dear, I hope I didn't scare you," Nora said with a giggle.

"You know me, Mrs Allen, I never get scared," Hal responded easily. He prized himself on his ability to recover quickly.

"Hal, you know I'm always 'Mom' to you," she chastised.

"Of course, Mrs Allen." She giggled again.

"I missed you so much, Mom," Barry said, giving her another hug. "It's still so weird living an entire semester without you!"

"Oh, stop, you say that every year. I'm sure you boys get into all sorts of trouble you don't tell me about." She winked at Hal, making him blush profusely, then helped them put their trunks on a trolley. "The car is out here, I'll take you home and then I'll start on the pork chops."

True to her word, Nora drives them straight to the house and starts on dinner. The car ride is filled with 60’s music and excitement as mother and son sing along to the likes of the Mamas and the papas and Hal is just happy to see Barry happy. His best friend’s cheer is contagious, to say the least. Before long, he joins in on the singing. When they arrive at the house, Hal is almost sad to leave the car.

“You boys head on upstairs and make yourselves comfortable, alright? I already put new sheets on both bunks so you can settle in properly.” She skipped off into the kitchen, not seeing Hal’s grin.

“Dude, I forgot you have a bunk bed,” Hal started. “You are such a monumental dork.”

Barry blushed in response. “Shut up, I know you love sleeping on the top bunk.”

“Of course I do,” he agreed easily, carrying his and Barry’s trunks up the stairs ignoring the protests from both his muscles and Barry. “I just wouldn’t deign to own one myself.”

Barry giggled and opened his bedroom door for Hal. Everything was just as he remembered from their last school break, right down to the microscope stored on a tower of “must reads.” Hal took a deep breath, the scent of his best friend filling his lungs with longing. Merlin, he was in for it this time. He wouldn’t last the week.

“Hal you really didn’t have to carry all of my stuff,” Barry admonished. He had a warm smile as he shook his head at Hal.

Hal mimed wiping sweat off his brow in reply. “Are you kidding? And leave my best friend to struggle up all those stairs? I don’t think so.”

Barry rolled his eyes. “Hal, we’re eighteen. We can use magic at home.”

Hal blushed and muttered, “oh, yeah.” When he looked up from his shoes, Barry was giving him the fondest smile. It made it hard for Hal to breathe. He panicked at the attention and ended up distracting Barry. “Wanna play cars while we wait for dinner?”

Barry grinned big. “Gobstones or Go Fish?”

Hal grinned back just as big. “Both?”

They spent the next hour messing around in Barry’s room, Hal letting Barry win at Gobstones and Barry letting Hal win at Go Fish. It made Hal vaguely paranoid, thinking about how Barry will never be like this with him again once he knows about his feelings for him. Hal was an idiot. They had a lovely dinner with Barry’s parents when Henry got home from work, and then returned to his room and hang out for a little while longer. They watched a marathon of the Cornetto Trilogy and made it through Hot Fuzz before collapsing into bed. Hal couldn’t help but talk to Barry a bit as they fell asleep.

“Bear?”

“Hmph?” Barry mumbled back.

“What do you wanna do tomorrow?”

“I dunno, we could go to that ice cream place you like downtown. Maybe the book store and the French shop? You like to see the pet shop too, usually. We’ll go to all your places.”

Hal beamed up at the ceiling. “Sounds great. You’re the best, Bear.”

“Know you are, what ‘m I?”

Hal grinned harder. “Night.”

“Oh,” Barry continued, slightly more awake like he just remembered it, “and maybe the next day you could meet Iris.”

Hal froze. “Sounds good,” he squeaked, but what he really wanted to say was ‘fuck.’


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I know, I know, I missed two weeks and I'm sorry. I'm trying to do a double update this week to make up for it. Vacation makes us forget! Please forgive me!

After a quick but nutritious breakfast of oatmeal, the boys set out for downtown. Barry’s parents had taken the car to work before they woke up, so Barry suggested that they bike into town. Hal decided to make it a race. He lost.

“How did you do that?” Hal gasped, slowly sliding off his bike so he could lock it up next to Barry’s outside the bookstore.

Barry shrugged, not even out of breath. Bastard. “They don’t call me the fastest kid in Central for nothing.”

“They don’t call you that,” Hal said, raising his eyebrows. "People call you that? Who calls you that?”

“I think I see a sign for a sale on mystery novels,” Barry ignored him with a small, smug smile as he walked past into Collins’ Books. 

With that, Hal was struck once again by the complete and overwhelming love he felt for his best friend. The guy was just too hot sometimes. “Wait for me,” he called. Barry turned and watched with a sweeter smile now as Hal followed him into the store. Hal could have melted from the sight.

They spent the next two hours just wandering the isles, Hal making sarcastic comments about some of the titles they passed and Barry giggling and shushing him. Occasionally Barry would unleash a killer joke and leave Hal crying three steps back before giving in and cracking up, too. They were only shushed by Mrs Collins three times, which was pretty impressive for Hal. Usually he got kicked out, but he was making an effort for Barry's sake.

They didn't buy any books, but they definitely bought things at the next shop. Hal needed his bonbons. 

The French shop, Le Magasin, had everything a teenage halfblood could ask for. The front of the shop was for muggles, where Hal got all the best French chocolate every time he came. In the back of the shop, when they tapped on a picture of the Prime Minister, there was a secret door to the wizard shop. They had everything from pumpkin juice to chocolate escargot. Hal and Barry were in heaven.

"Look, Hal," Barry yelled from across the shop, holding up something that looked vaguely like a group statue but in chocolate. The little people were arguing. "It's a scene from Les Miserables! En chocolat!"

"Magnifique!" Hal yelled back, giving a thumbs up. He was trying his best to find something unmistakably lovey dovey to buy for Barry. He thought it would be easier, seeing as the French were known for being romantic.

Then, he saw it. The holy grail of Barry presents. 

"Bear, I've just seen something amazing and I need to buy it for you," Hal announced. 

Barry blushed and started toward him. "What's up?"

"No!" Hal dramatically lunged forward and grabbed his best friend by the shoulders. "Not yet! It has to be a surprise!"

Barry rolled his eyes and smiled softly up at him. "Alright, fine. I'll be up front buying all that muggle candy we found earlier. You do... whatever you're going to do."

Hal grinned. "Thanks, Bear, you won't regret it."

Barry raised an eyebrow. "That just makes me worried."

Hal shooed his friend back into the muggle section, then spun around to examine his prize. It was only fifteen sickles, which was a steal in Hal's eyes. How anyone could charge so low for a chocolate solar system was beyond him.

A moving chocolate solar system. That included Pluto. And Ceres. Barry was going to flip.

Mme Blanc seemed to know what Hal was up to with his present and offered to engrave the base for him. He couldn't think of anything to say other than "you're out of this world," so he declined. He'd have time before he gave it to him anyway, if Hal had figured this right.

"Ready?" Barry asked with a grin that nearly matched Hal's. "I figured now was as good a time as any to get ice cream."

If it was possible, Hal's eyes lit up even more. "I'm always ready for ice cream."

The boys set off down the street and joked around as they walked. Hal couldn't believe what a nice day it had been so far. The weather was perfect, the company was sublime, and the chocolate was plentiful. Nothing could ruin this for him.

"Get off me!" A girl was being surrounded by a bunch of skeezy-looking guys in front of the ice cream shop. Hal and Barry didn't even have to look at each other before they were running over to help her.

The guys in question looked familiar to Hal, and his suspicions were confirmed as soon as Barry opened his mouth. "Snart, what the heck are you doing?"

Leonard Snart turned around to sneer at the boys while his buddies continued grabbing at the girl's bags. "None of your business, Allen, step off."

The girl saw them and her face lit up. "Hi, Barry!"

Snart and his gang were some of the bigger bullies at Hogwarts. Hal had actually forgotten that the guys were from Central, it wasn't like he talked to them much. Most of them were in sixth year to boot. What Hal did know was that these guys were assholes who didn't seem to care about doing anything for themselves and always took the easy way out. He had caught the Walker kid harassing a first year once. A first year. Hal was all ready to get into a fist fight, but it looked like Barry had other plans.

Barry sighed and smiled at Snart, looking tired all of a sudden. "Really, man, what are you doing? You think messing with Iris again is going to make you feel better? Whatever is bothering you right now, you know I'm always here to help."

"Look, Allen--" Snart looked like he was going to kill Barry. Then, to Hal's surprise, his look softened and he slouched a little. "You know how it is. Holidays can be a bitch."

"Yeah, I do know how it is," Barry agreed, taking a step closer. "I also know that you know your home life isn't a proper excuse."

Snart's gang had stopped harassing Iris and were now simply standing around her so that she couldn't move to safety. Hal, for his part, had positioned himself menacingly behind Barry to act as the tough guy in the situation. He wasn't sure he'd need to step in, but he was ready anyway.

"Oh, piss off, Allen," Snart exploded, gesturing wildly. "You don't understand what it's like to have to provide for your family. You'll never really understand what I go through every day."

Barry shrugged. "You're right, I won't. The best I can do is remind you that you're not your father and you don't have to act like him."

"Excuse you?" Snart screamed. "Whatever, fag, get away from me! Come on, guys, let's go down to the river and dick around."

Hal was ready to punch the guy just for using that word, but Barry was calmly watching them go. Not stopping to wait for Hal, Barry stepped forward to check on Iris.

"Hey, Iris, sorry I had to run into you in such a rough situation," Barry said, patting her arm.

Iris smiled softly at him. "Oh, I would have gotten them to stop eventually. They weren't going to do anything, you know they never do."

"That doesn't make it alright when they gang up on you like that," Barry countered.

Iris grinned. "That's my Barry, always there to protect the innocent and understand the criminal. I'm fine, Barry, really. I want to know if you're okay."

"Yeah, I can probably catch up to them if you want me to make them apologize," Hal put in.

Barry waved them off. "It's alright, he's just mad that I understand why he's such a jerk all the time."

The three of them stood in silence for a moment, taking in how uncomfortable the entire situation was. It wasn't Snart's fault that his dad was an asshole, but that didn't make it okay to take it out on Iris. She needed better assurance that they would at least leave her alone, even if they kept messing with other kids, but she wasn't about to ask for that. Barry was just too understanding for his own good sometimes.

"Hey, I wasn't sure if you wanted one scoop of two so I just--" the newcomer stopped right outside the ice cream shop and stared. "Barry? Hal? When did you get here?"

"Oh, you're Hal! Of course you're Hal, Barry has told me so much about you that I should have recognized you!" Iris exclaimed.

"Thawne?" Barry raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing here? Are you... hanging out with Iris?"

Eobard grinned. "Yeah, didn't she tell you we're friends now?"

Iris pushed her hair behind her ear and looked at the ground. "Eobard was just buying my ice cream since I left my cash at home. I'm helping him study for literature later."

Barry was silent. He was making a really uncomfortable face that he only makes when he wants to glare at someone but can't because he's too nice. It makes Hal want to punch Eobard. "Sounds fun."

"You guys could come with us," Eobard suggested. "We were going to study at the park."

Hal couldn't escape the way Thawne was looking at him. It was almost like he knew about... no, he didn't, Hal wasn't that obvious. Then again...

Barry was saying his name and frowning. "Hal? You wanna do that? We don't have to."

"Sure," Hal shook his head. Maybe he could play defense with Thawne and get Barry and Iris some alone time. Hal hates his life. "As long as I get my ice cream I'm happy."

"Great!" Thawne clapped Hal and Barry on the shoulders and grinned. "I recommend the rocky road. Best flavor by far."

"Thanks, I remember," Hal dismissed him. He didn't need suggestions from this asshole. He knew enough about this city to make his own decisions.

Barry looked a little slumped, but he smiled when he looked at Iris, so Hal quickly forgot about the odd posture. He really did want ice cream, and Barry was getting what he wanted so what more could he ask?

The guys bought their snack and the four of them went on their merry way toward Garrick Park. Thawne didn't argue when Hal steered him to the back of the group to let Barry talk to Iris, which was admittedly kind of weird. He'd have to keep an eye on this guy for more reasons than one.

Then, out of nowhere, Thawne asks, "jealous?"

"What?" Hal splutters. "No! I mean Iris is great and all, but she's not really my type."

"I wasn't talking about Iris." His smirk is more than enough to tip Hal off, but he's not about to give in that easily.

"Then who were you talking about?"

Thawne smiles softly and looks at Barry. He was laughing at something Iris said and his eyes sparkled with it. It made Hal's heart hurt. "His eyes look great in this light, don't you think?"

Hal tried his best to look freaked out. "You think... what the hell, man? I knew you were weird but what the actual fuck?"

Thawne put up his hands in surrender. "I'm just trying to find something we both want to talk about, that's all. And please, don't pretend you've never thought about it."

"Let's talk quidditch, then," Hal's glare should have been enough to send the guy packing, but Thawne just smiled at him. 'We both want to talk about?' What the hell? If that meant what Hal thought it did, a bitch was about to get beat up. 

"Ravenclaw is looking good this year, wouldn't you say?" Did he just check Barry out? Did he look at his ass?! Oh, hello no, no no no no--

"This looks like a good spot, huh guys?" Iris said, stalling Hal's rage for the time being.

The four of them sat down under the tree Iris had found and proceeded to generally have a good time. Thawne kept giving Barry looks, which weren't noticed by the boy himself, and Hal kept giving Thawne looks which were smirked at and otherwise ignored. Hal was getting close to the maddest he's ever been.

After a few hours, Iris gets Thawne to piss off, and they spend the rest of the day hanging out just the three of them. This just makes Hal sad. At least when the villain was with them Hal could distract himself with pure anger, but now he couldn't even do that. He could never be mad at Iris. She was too nice and beautiful and perfect for Barry, and Hal was not. He was nothing, just an angry, lonely, useless failure.

"Gee, Bear, I'm bushed," Hal said suddenly with a fake yawn. "I think I'll turn in. Nice meeting you, Iris."

Barry's brow furrowed. "You sure, buddy? We were thinking about watching a movie."

"Yeah, Thirteen Going On Thirty or Clueless?" Iris giggled.

"She means which one do you want to watch first," Barry grinned, referencing the movie he and Hal had watched the night before.

The butterflies in Hal's stomach threw up. "Yeah I think I'm just tired from the train ride still. You kids have fun without me, alright? Curfew is at eleven!"

Iris giggled again and Barry started to, but he was still concerned. He could tell something was wrong, but Hal would be dead before he let Barry figure it out. He plastered on a grin, then huffed and rolled his eyes when Barry wasn't fooled.

"I'm fine, Bear, really. Have fun with your home friend. I'll be here when you get back."

Barry still didn't look convinced, but he knew when to stop pushing. "Alright, have fun up there."

Hal winked and spun around and through the doorway. He felt like death warmed over, but at least Barry was having a good time.

At least Barry was having a good time.

At least...

God dammit.


	7. Chapter 7

Hal had been so upset the night before that he'd forgotten about his present for Barry. It wouldn't have been the right time, anyway. It would probably never be the right time. Maybe Hal should just eat the damn thing himself and eliminate the middle man and all the pain and shame in waiting for someone who will never care.

Or maybe Hal just needed some coffee. Yes, definitely coffee.

He rolled out of the bed and down the side, hair everywhere and face covered in dried slobber. Hal snorted at the thought. His outside matched his inside, horribly messy and embarrassing. Maybe he should stay like that, not shower or comb his hair and just... be a garbage fire.

He turned around, and his heart melted. 

Barry was still asleep, snoring lightly and clutching his blanket like a little kid missing his stuffed animal. He had a little satisfied smile on his face and his left dimple was poking in. His hair was as much of a mess as Hal's, but on Barry it was downright adorable. Hal couldn't stand it.

Barry's eyes opened and he smiled softly up at Hal. "Hey."

"Hey," Hal said, just as softly. 

"Oh good, you're awake." The moment shattered and so did Hal. Once again, he had forgotten about Iris.

Barry groaned and put his arm over his eyes. "Morning, already?"

"Sleep well, Iris?" Hal casually yanked Barry's sheets off of his bed. Barry screamed at the chill and glared up at Hal murderously.

"Yes, actually, Barry's couch is very comfortable." She said it without annoyance, but Hal knew Barry was about to apologize for not giving her his bed. Sometimes, he was just too nice.

Hal cut him off before he could apologize. "So, what are we up to today? Bear, you wanna hit up the pet store? We missed it on yesterday's rounds."

"Well," Barry hesitated, glancing at Iris, "actually Iris suggested last night that we could all go to the art museum today. They're featuring an Ancient Greek exhibit this month."

"We don't have to, of course," Iris added hastily. "I know you only have so much vacation time so if you'd rather be by yourselves then that's perfectly alright with me."

"Of course we'd like to hang out with you," Barry assured her. He gave Hal a pleading look that she couldn't see.

Hal plastered on a grin. "Yeah, smart girl like you could probably teach us a lot at a museum. I wouldn't miss that for the world." Dammit. Fuck. Shit. Balls. Hal hated this so much he just knew Barry would be able to see it. Spending an entire day watching Barry flirt with someone else could actually kill him.

"Thanks, Hal, that means a lot," Barry said, smiling softly. Dammit. Fuck. Shit. Balls. Hal couldn't be mad at that face.

The trio spent the entire rest of the day at the museum until dinner time rolled around. As Hal had joked, Iris had in fact known quite a bit about Ancient Greece. Barry had been fascinated by her vast knowledge of Greek city-states and their politics and wars. Hal had been extremely self conscious about his own lack of knowledge and felt terrible about it. Every time she wowed them with some detail about the Phoenicians or the Minoans, Barry had gotten more out of his shell and Hal had shrunken in on himself.

Barry had bought her a souvenir at the gift shop with a pun about Athens on it. Hal had bought himself a bag of jellybeans, eaten all of them, and made himself sick from all the sugar. Barry had laughed until he cried at a joke Iris made. Hal had pretended to laugh because he wasn't actually listening when the joke was made. Barry had almost gotten to hold Iris' hand at one point. Hal had almost thrown up.

When the museum closed, the boys took Iris back to Barry's with them for some homemade pork chops. They made plans to go to the city museum the next day. They watched another movie. Iris stayed over too late to walk home, so she slept on the couch that night again. Apparently, her dad deemed the sleepover acceptable because there were two boys, not just Barry. Hal deemed that both frustrating and bad parenting.

Hal spent his time at the city museum the next day rotating between being an excellent wingman and being horribly jealous. He hated every second of it. In that sense, it was largely the same experience as the day before.

How in Merlin's name Barry and Iris didn't notice his frustration was beyond his meager comprehension, but it might have had something to do with their outstanding chemistry. Barry *would* have chemistry with someone that's not Hal. Typical. Barry was just too perfect. 

It made it even worse that Iris was a great girl. She was nice, smart, and funny. She was very self assured, but she wasn't a dick about anything. She listened when Barry talked, and he listened when she talked, but she also had a lot of ammo to back her up if they disagreed about something. This didn't come up very often at the city museum, but Hal could tell these kinds of things about a person. She was just a really good person, and Hal hated her for it. How was he supposed to root against someone that perfect?

It was at dinner that day, this time Mrs Allen made spaghetti, that Hal realized he was being ridiculous. He had, at this point, spent a total of two and a half day's third-wheeling the guy he loved and the girl who that boy liked, just to help Barry out. This was stupid because, as far as Hal could tell when he was only paying attention half the time, Barry was doing alright without his wingman. There was no reason for Hal to sit there in incalculable emotional pain, he could just let the two lovebirds have fun without him! He'd probably feel much better if he didn't have to watch them be all flirty and gross.

That settled, Hal decided to fake feeling sick the next morning and let Barry go hang out with Iris without him. It was what was best for everyone, and Hal was rather proud of himself for thinking of it. Now, he was free to dick around the Allen house and enjoy his vacation without thinking about Barry all the time. Hal was a genius.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the short update! I promise there will be another one this week. I know I say that a lot, but this time it's really gonna happen.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry this took me so long!!! I've had a lot of crazy shit going down the last few weeks and I just straight up hadn't finished this chapter until just now. I'm posting two at once because I feel so bad about this, then I'll have a short epilogue and that'll be it! Let me know if it was worth the excessive wait... Sorry again!
> 
> PS sorry it's so short but the conclusion will be posted in just a few minutes so bear with me!

Hal was not a genius. Hal was, as previously stated many a time, an idiot. 

The plan had gone off without a hitch in the morning. He'd woken up before Barry, so he made a show of stumbling down the ladder of the bunk bed and sprinting down the hall to the bathroom. He didn't make any retching noises until he had been in the bathroom for a few minutes, then he made a couple really loud ones. He waited a few seconds after that, flushed the toilet, and flopped dramatically against the bathtub. It didn't take long for Barry to find him.

"Oh Merlin, Hal, are you okay?" Barry said, handing him a tissue to wipe the spit Hal had purposely left on his chin. "I heard you from my room and got worried. It sounded awful."

Hal looked up at Barry weakly from his slump. "Meh, I'll be okay. You know how it--" he dramatically cut himself off and leaned back over the bowl to retch a little more, then pretended to give up and lean back against the tub. "Sorry, thought I had another one coming."

"Oh, Hal," Barry muttered. He looked him over with such concern that it was beginning to make Hal feel legitimately nauseous. "I'm so sorry you feel bad, buddy. Is there anything I can get you?"

Hal cleared his throat. "No, I'm okay for now. Just a little cold. No, wait, warm. I'm too warm." He mentally rolled his eyes at himself. He needed to stop laying it on so thick or Barry would figure out something was up.

Barry's frown didn't waver, though, and Hal thanked Merlin for Barry's faith in the people. "I'll tell Iris that we'll stay home today, then. I'll be right back."

"Really, Bear, you don't have to stay home," Hal assured him, using a bigger, stronger voice than he had been to better convey his point. "I'll be ok in a couple hours. I'll catch up to you, I promise."

Barry side-eyed him. "Hal there is no way I'm going to leave you here after you just threw up. You're my best friend."

Hal almost smacked himself. What the hell was he doing? Barry was his friend. Hal should be able to suck up his jealousy for long enough to spend time with the guy at least. They were supposed to be in Central hanging out together and with Barry's local friends, not pining silently in the house while Barry goes out by himself. Hal was an idiot.

"Who wants breakfast?" Iris called. Or, Hal thought to himself, he could give Iris and Barry a chance to be alone together by staying home. Yes. He wasn't being a jealous asshole, he was helping out his friend.

Hal grinned up at his friend from the floor. "I'll be fine. You go woo your girl, and maybe I'll feel better when you come back."

Barry frowned harder. "Okay, but I won't be happy about it."

Hal, as it turned out, was also not happy about it. He spent the entire day thinking about what Iris and Barry were doing. What Barry was doing alone with Iris at yet another museum, if she was looking at him the way he looked at her, if he'd actually made a move yet or not. The last one had Hal's head spinning, and not in the fun way.

Thawne appeared to ruin Hal’s day further at about lunchtime. Hal was sitting in Barry’s living room eating a ham and cheese sandwich, watching Seinfeld, and feeling like shit. The doorbell rang, and he ignored it. It rang again; he ignored it again. There was a lengthy and aggressive knock, and Hal took another bite of his sandwich.

“Jordan!” A boy’s face appeared in the front window. “I know you’re in there, open up!”

Hal just rolled his eyes. “What do you want, Thawne?” He yelled, pausing the show. Maybe he could get rid of the little creep quickly.

“Open the door and you’ll find out!” Weirdo. Hal got up and opened the front door but blocked Thawne from entering.

“What do you want?” Hal said. “I’m busy.”

Thawne raised an eyebrow and looked Hal up and down. “Clearly.” He hadn’t gotten dressed yet because he felt like shit, and was only now regretting that decision. 

Hal crossed his arms and tried to look more imposing than he felt. “What do you want? Need some quidditch advice for next season, or are you planning on losing all by yourself?”

“Really?” Thawne raised his second eyebrow and stared at Hal over his sunglasses. “That was your best shot? Honestly, Jordan, I’m disappointed, you’re usually much more scathing. Something bothering you? Perhaps the fact that you’ve been left at home alone, without Barry?”

“You’re usually more subtle, but I wasn’t going to say anything,” Hal muttered. “And for your information, I’m fine. I was feeling sick this morning so Barry and Iris went to the museum without me. I might meet up with them later.”

Thawne laughed. “Oh, honey, we both know that’s not true. I mean, look at you! You look like you crawled out of your dumpster days ago and have slept outside in the rain since then.”

Hal frowned. “That’s oddly specific.”

“And you’re oddly dressed, but that’s not why I’m here.”

“Well then, why are you here?”

Thawne paused a moment for dramatic effect, then shrugged. “Just thought I’d pop by and see how you were doing now that you’ve been left behind for someone prettier and smarter and better than you in every way?”

“Hey!” Hal protested. “I resemble that remark and it’s the thing I’m sensitive about!”

Thawne snorted. “I can tell.”

Hal glared down at the little creep. “Why am I talking to you anyway? Leave! Go home, you little weirdo!?” With that eloquent exclamation, Hal slammed the door and returned to the living room. He could hear Thawne laughing from outside.

He almost couldn't stand it, what Thawne had said really got into his head, so when Barry got home Hal pretended to be asleep. He couldn't keep doing this to himself. He either needed to get over his crush or he needed to tell the guy. But how? Usually, Hal would just walk up to the person he liked and start talking. He'd flirt like a fiend and if they didn't respond, he'd drop it. But with Barry, he already loved him.

Hal loved him more than he knew anyone could love a person. He thought about him all the time. Barry was funny, crazy smart, and one of the most beautiful people Hal knew. Most people didn't see it, but Hal could. Whenever Barry got really into an experiment, or he read about a knew theory that answered some of his questions about the world, he would talk about it for hours. His whole face would light up with the joy of learning something knew and it lit Hal's heart on fire with love.

Hal could listen to Barry for hours, too. He loved his voice. He loved seeing Barry excited about something, anything. He loved watching Barry on the quidditch pitch, so much faster than every other player. Hal loved seeing him catch the snitch even when Hal was playing against him because the look of triumph on his face was enough to make Hal happy. When Barry was happy, Hal was happy. When Barry was sad, Hal was sad. They knew things about each other that no one else did. They shared a bond with each other that no one could break.

Hal had it bad, and there was no way he could get over it. It looked like he was going to have to tell Barry how he felt.

As Hal fell asleep that night, he remembered something perfect; there was a pond nearby where they could go swimming.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, as promised! Just a cute epilogue to go now!

When Hal woke up the next morning, he was reinvigorated. Now that he had decided to tell Barry how much he loved him, nothing could stop him from doing just that. It was six in the morning, but there was no way Hal was going to make it back to sleep, so he quietly crept downstairs. He didn't see any sign of Iris, which would make his plan to exclude her much easier.

Hal set to work packing a picnic for two, featuring two cupcakes that Mrs Allen had made for their arrival, their favorite kinds of sandwiches, a variety of chips, and some strawberries because those were Barry's favorite. Of course, he couldn’t forget Barry’s giant fucking chocolate solar system. If there was ever a time to give a man that much chocolate, the time was now. If Hal was going to do this, he was going to do it right. 

When he was done, he went back upstairs to find something to swim in. He hoped Barry had an extra pair of swim trunks that he could wear, otherwise he'd have to wear boxers. Hal didn't think splashing around in his underwear would set the right mood.

As he was walking up, Mrs Allen was walking down. She saw him coming and stopped halfway down the stairs.

"Hello, dear, are you feeling better this morning?" Oops, Hal had forgotten about yesterday.

"Oh yes, much better," he grinned full force up at her. "It must have been something I ate."

Mrs Allen smiled at pat his cheek. "Well, that's good to hear. What are you boys planning on doing today?"

"Swimming and a picnic," Hal replied sweetly. "But don't tell Barry, it's a surprise."

"Oh, I see," she winked at him, and suddenly Hal felt that she really did understand. "I think I have a spare set of trunks you could borrow if you'll be needing some, dear."

"That would be lovely." He followed her back up the stairs to a hall closet where she apparently kept a lot of old clothes. She rummaged around a bit before pulling out a pair of bright green shorts.

"Will these do? We bought them for Barry, but they were always a bit too big. He has others now."

Hal grinned. "They're perfect." He proceeded to spend far too much time getting ready for what was simply a picnic and swim date. He elected not to bring any spare clothes for himself because he figured his body would work in his favor. His abs, at least, should give him an edge in these uncertain times. He brushed his teeth far longer than he usually did because he was paranoid about bad breath. He washed his face with extra soap because he didn’t want to feel oily when he was going in for the big finish. He put his usual mousse in his hair even though it would wash out in the lake because honestly, why would he ever not use his mousse?

When Hal walked back downstairs, Barry was sitting at the table eating cereal and checking the news on his phone. Dork. 

“Hey, Bear, what’s up?” Hal asked, not wanting to give himself away just yet. 

Barry turned around to smile at him, then his eyes widened in shock and his entire face blushed.

Hal blushed too. "What?"

Barry struggled and finally got a single word to come out of his mouth, "shirt."

Hal looked down and smirked. He still had it. Years of quidditch had made him, to quote Dinah, 'damn toned, especially where it counts.'

It wasn't that they hadn't seen each other shirtless before. It had just been a while. Probably since fifth year. Well, Hal's inner monologue said 'probably,' he knew it was when Hal forced Barry to take a dip in the lake at Hogwarts on the last day of summer term fifth year. Barry had been so nervous they'd get eaten by the squid, it was so cute. How had Hal not realized his feelings earlier?

“Anything interesting happening in the world today?” Hal asked casually, still baring his chest and abs to the air for a full front view. He was going to make the most of what he had because what he had was damn fine.

Barry was staring at his chest still, making Hal blush all the way down to his toes. He didn’t say anything for a moment, then his head whipped up suddenly and his own blush caught up with him. “Huh? Oh, um. Not really.” He stared down at his cereal but didn’t eat any more. Then, his head snapped back up to look Hal in the eyes. “Why are you wearing swim trunks?”

Hal grinned. “Remember that lake you told me about that’s just a short walk from your house?”

“Yeah?” Barry blanched.

Hal took this as a good sign. “Wanna go swimming?”

Barry floundered for a moment, looking adorably off guard. Hal smiled to himself. This was going beautifully. Then, Barry stood up and walked quickly over to Hal.

Everything seemed to stop, or at least be moving in slow motion. Hal started to close his eyes instinctively before he could really tell what the hell was going on. Was this really happening? Was Barry about to kiss him?

Barry grabbed Hal forcefully by the chin, his other hand wrapped around Hal’s bicep. He leaned in a little, then jerked Hal’s chin to the side.

“Are you sure you’re up to it?” He asked, no trace of lust in his voice, only concern. Hal felt all of his willpower drain out of him. He was so stupid, staying home yesterday and pretending to be sick. Barry continued checking Hal over for signs that he’s still sick, so Hal just rolled his eyes and shoved Barry away lightly.

“I’m fine, stop mother-henning,” Hal assured his friend. “Tell you what, you go get your trunks on and I’ll get some food ready, how’s that? We’ll have a picnic while we’re down at the lake and just hang out for a while.”

“Alright.” The demure smile Hal received was one of the sweetest he had ever seen. “But if you feel sick again, we’re coming back home.”

Hal rolled his eyes again, but this time Barry could see it. “Yes, Dear.”

Barry smirked and swatted him lightly on the arm. “I’ll run upstairs.”

Hal was grinning to himself as he put the finishing touches on their picnic. If the rest of the day went as good as this, Hal was going to have a boyfriend by the end of it for sure.

He heard footsteps on the stairs and turned around just in time.

Barry was standing there in his shorts and nothing else. It was the same outfit as Hal, except these shorts were Gryffindor colored. Hal could feel them calling out to him. Barry looked so damn good shirtless, it should be illegal. He tended to wear baggier clothes day-to-day, so Hal had forgotten just how toned Barry was. He had to be, to be the fastest Seeker Hogwarts had ever seen, but it was one thing to know that and another to see it. Hal almost couldn’t believe his eyes. He felt like he was drooling, so he started and turned back to the basket.

“All done with the food,” he announced, picking up the basket and turning back towards Barry. He meant to look at his face, and then he remembered the man’s legs and had to take a look. They were downright sinful, all long and beautifully strong. Hal really needed to get a fucking grip. “We should grab towels too, I guess.”

Barry chuckled lightly and held up the only thing in his arms; towels. “Got it covered.”

Hal blushed harder. “Right.”

Barry laughed. “Come on, let’s get going.”

The two boys smiled at each other for a moment, then looked away at the same time to walk out the door.

——

They dicked around a bit on the way out to the lake, Hal mostly but Barry got in a few moments. Hal couldn’t remember having a better time with his best friend. It made him even more nervous that he was about to ruin everything, but what was life without a little risk? Or big risk? Or terrifyingly huge, life-altering risk?

When they got to the lake, Hal set down the picnic basket and set a charm over it so that nothing would eat it or melt it. The chocolate had its own non-melting charm, but Hal did an extra just to be safe. They both wanted to jump right in, so they did. They spent a few hours just floating around in the water, occasionally starting and restarting splash fights like a couple of six year olds. Hal couldn’t remember a time when he’s been happier. He felt like he mattered when he was with Barry. He felt like he was important, at least to Barry. Most of all, he felt loved.

They eventually both grew hungry and decided to get out of the water and eat the lunch Hal had packed. Barry loved the sandwiches and was very impressed by Hal’s planning skills. His eyes lit up when he saw the strawberries.

“My favorites!” He exclaimed.

Hal chuckled. “Of course! Only the best for you, Bear.”

Barry answered that comment with a blush. They ate in a comfortable silence for the most part, and when they were done Hal decided to get out the piece de resistance: the chocolate solar system.

“So you’ve had a fun time so far?” Hal asked innocently, putting their garbage and dishes back into the basket to take home.

Barry nodded, leaning back against the tree which they were sitting under. “I always have a fun time with you.”

Hal grinned. “Same here, buddy. I’m glad we could have this whole day to ourselves.” ‘Here it comes,’ Hal thought to himself. ‘A few seconds to create a segue into chocolates and you’re as good as gold.’

“Me too,” Barry smiled at him. “I mean, Iris probably would have liked to come here, too.” Fuck no. Don’t think about her. “She actually mentioned this lake the other day. Maybe I should take her here sometime. Do you think she’d like it? I mean, it’s a great place for friends to come and hang out, but maybe…”

The more Barry talked, the more Hal felt like his heart was being torn in two.

Hal stood up angrily and started pacing.

"I can't stand it anymore, Bear. I was gonna wait until we got back to school but I just can't stand it."

"Hal, what's wrong? Is everything ok?" Barry sat forward with concern, but he didn’t get up.

"What's wrong? What's wrong is that every time you smile at me my heart melts. Everything you do is fascinating to me and I can't... do you even know how beautiful you are? Your eyes, they remind me of the open sea back home. Your laugh never fails to make me smile, your brains are unbelievably attractive, your damn sweater vests and bow ties make me want to explode with love for you. I'm trying to say... well, I guess I just said it. I love you, Barry Allen. I want to be with you. I'm sorry."

"Hallie, you have nothing to be sorry about." And then, just like that, Barry was up off the ground and kissing him. It was everything like he had dreamed it would be, all encompassing and yet not enough, never enough. It was just lips touching lips and already Hal felt lightheaded.

Barry pulled away and grinned up at his best friend. "I can't believe I waited this long to do that."

"I can't believe you wanted to do that," Hal said quietly, and Barry giggled. "What about Iris?"

"She's nice and funny and pretty," Barry allowed.

"You're making me nervous, here, Bear."

"But she's not you," Barry finished. He kissed Hal again, quickly this time, and smiled softly when he pulled away. "You're the most wonderful person I know. No one else compares."

Hal groaned and buried his face in his friend's neck. "Shut up, you're making me blush."

Barry laughed softly and pulled Hal's face back up to his. "That's the point, handsome."

They were kissing again, and Hal didn't think he could ever get enough. The softness of Barry's lips against his own, the slide of them as Barry moved, the soft sounds he made when Hal nibbled at his bottom lip. Hal was in heaven. They kissed for what felt like hours under that tree, both of them wanting to stay there forever and neither of them believing it was really happening. After a little while, Hal jolted back and started rummaging around in the picnic basket again.

“Hallie?” Barry asked softly, still a bit dazed from being kissed within an inch of his life. “You okay?”

“I almost forgot!” He yelled, triumphantly retrieving a box from inside the basket. “Remember on that first day when we went to that chocolate shop?” Barry nodded, a little confused. Hal smiled. “Well, I got you this.”

Barry opened the box and gasped. The solar system of chocolate inside had a sun bigger than his head, with everything else scaled to size. Each planet was covered in marbling to make it look like its actual surface. It even had the asteroid belt between the rock planets and the gas giants, featuring all five dwarf planets. Still, the best part of the set was the engraving which read, “To the most handsome man in the galaxy, I love you, Barry.”

Barry choked with tears and surged forward to hug his new boyfriend. “I love it! Can we eat all of it right now?”

Hal laughed. “Hell yeah, beautiful!”

Barry pulled back and was blushing before Hal realized what he said. He sputtered a little trying to defend himself before Barry leaned in and kissed the shit out of him.

“Thanks, darlin’,” Barry said, looking up through his eyelashes. “But, I want you to know that you would have gotten the same amount of kisses if it was engraved ‘you’re out of this world.’”

Hal grinned and kissed his boyfriend back. “God, I love you.”

Barry grinned back. “I love you, too. Let’s start with Mercury and work our way up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woohoo! I finally did it! I finished this thing! holy shit, right? anyway, realllllllly short epilogue will be posted in a couple days. goodnight, everybody!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! It's been a wild while for me out here, not to mention the grievous error I only just realized: Soranik is dating Kyle, not John! I've just edited the whole fic to have Katma in instead, hopefully I've hit every instance. let me know if I missed anything. anyway: Last installment! It's been a kooky couple of months but I'd like to thank everyone who stuck with me. I know I'm far from reliable when it comes to updates, but it means a lot to me that you all care enough to read my stuff. Thank you for all the comments and kudos, reading them really does make me happy. 
> 
> now, on with the show!

Barry couldn't believe his luck. What were the chances that Hal Jordan, heartthrob of the class three years running, would have a crush on him? Barry, who was but a small nerd in a big, weird world? He knew the chances, they were higher than he expected. It helped that they were best friends, of course, but Barry was still counting himself lucky that they'd even gotten /that/ far. Yes, nothing could have shocked Barry more than when he first kissed Hal Jordan.

It was, for lack of a better word, a magical experience. It was everything Barry wanted and more. It was perfect. Once he recovered from the extreme surprise of being allowed to kiss Hal Jordan, it was one of the greatest events of Barry's life.

They had spent the rest of the Easter holidays just enjoying each other's' company and generally goofing off like they always did. There was one major difference though; lots and lots of kissing. They kissed in the morning, they kissed in the evening, they kissed in the house, they kissed outside. They even got caught kissing in Barry's room by his mom! They weren't allowed to kiss in there after that, but the rule got rescinded when she caught them kissing on the couch. All in all, it was the best Easter holiday Barry had ever had. He almost hated to go back to school, but Barry really liked Hogwarts so it didn't get that far.

On Easter Monday, the boys picked up Ralph on their way to the train station, then proceeded to pretend that they were not yet dating. Hal wanted to mess with everyone, and Barry agreed it would be quite cathartic. Despite their unsympathetic attitudes to the boys individually, their friends had been most helpful in not spilling the beans about the other guy's crush. Barry intended to make them pay for it.

"How could they have known and not helped us out?" Barry had asked in a furious rage the night before. "The least Dinah could have done was let me know you liked me..."

"My thoughts exactly, Bear. Agree to annoy the shit out of them tomorrow?"

"Agreed." The two shook on it, and that had been that. Maybe today wouldn't be such a drag after all.

"So what did you guys get up to this time around?" Ralph asked as the three of them searched for a train car to sit in.

Hal winked at him. "Wouldn't you like to know."

Barry rolled his eyes and elbowed his boyfriend. If Hal was going to act like that, they wouldn't be able to keep their friends in the dark for long. "Nothing much, we mostly hung out around the house."

"Went to a few museums," Hal said with an eyebrow wiggle.

"With Iris," Barry added casually, opening a cabin door and ducking inside.

"Ooo," Ralph said, his nose twitching. "Do tell, how is Ms West these days? Dare I ask, were the museums dates?"

Barry laughed too loudly from shock. Ralph reminding him of his intentions at the begging of the holiday really put events in perspective. Just last week, Barry had given up on Hal ever feeling the way Barry did and had decided to just try to get a date with Iris instead. Now, after all that beautiful kissing with Hal... and chocolate... they had eaten so much chocolate... Well, now, the idea of giving up on Hal seemed utterly ridiculous.

He turned to answer Ralph and saw Hal glaring at the floor. Barry's demeanor sobered immediately. "Nah, Ralphie, struck out. I don't think she's really the gal for me after all, you know? She's really nice, don't get me wrong, but I just don't feel that way about her."

Ralph raised his eyebrows. "I knew a lot could change in a week, but this is ridiculous."

Barry rolled his eyes. "Aw, come off it, Ralph. Besides, I think I might like someone else a whole lot more." The look on Hal's face was more than worth how obvious Barry was being. Lucky for him, before he could ask any more questions, John and Katma marched into the car.

"What do you idiots think you're doing?" Katma demanded. "We already have a car! Why didn't you come looking for us?"

"Katma! You're looking charming as ever," Hal grinned.

She rolled her eyes. "Just follow me." 

The guys did as they were told, following Katma into the next car to find their other friends. She led them back to her and John's cabin where they discovered Diana and Bruce wearing twin suspicious looks.

"Where'd you find them, Kat?" Diana asked. "Hiding in a closet somewhere?"

Hal rolled his eyes. "We found another cabin, your Royal Assumptioness. For your information, you shouldn't assume things. It makes-"

"-an ass out of you and me," Diana finished for him. "Like you need my help making an ass of yourself."

Hal looked excessively affronted and grasped at his chest. "How dare you? John, are you going to let her talk to me like that?!"

John shrugged. "Hey, you started it." 

Barry giggled at the scene as Hal spluttered to think of another witty reply. Bruce finally looked up from his book at that, glancing between Hal and Barry. His brow furrowed, then he looked down at his book and muttered "finally."

Barry's face immediately flushed in embarrassment at being found out so quickly, but no one else seemed to notice. They wanted to hold out at least until Ollie and Dinah got on at Starling, mostly because Hal could never keep something this big from Oliver. They didn't think Ollie would figure it out, but Hal didn't want to keep this from his other best friend. He was too excited and wanted to share.

Barry flushed again at the memory. Hal was adorable. 

The seven of them managed to occupy themselves for about an hour just talking about their respective spring breaks. Bruce and Diana had spent theirs at the Amazonian Embassy in London learning all about their diplomatic policies. This was important for Diana as the princess, but purely fun for Bruce. Katma and John wouldn't say too much about their break, but Kat said she snuck out a lot to go see him. A lot. Once Diana asked Ralph about his muggle girlfriend, he didn't shut up for half an hour. He loved talking about Sue, mostly because he was thinking about proposing. They had talked about the future a lot this break, Ralph said, so he felt like the time was approaching to ask. Everyone was very happy for him, Ralph and Sue were a cute couple.

After Ralph had said everything there was to say about dear Sue, Bruce and Diana got up to find Clark. Cardiff had been the stop before Central City, and that was the closest stop to Smallville. Ralph said he wanted to go look for his friend Ted, so he left too. Barry thought this would make it a lot easier to keep up the not-dating charade, but he was very wrong.

"So Hal," Katma started. "Do anything interesting over hols?"

Barry smirked as he pulled out his travel book. Dorian Grey wasn't going to reread itself, and Barry wanted to see how well Hal deflected on his own.

Hal shrugged, shuffling his cards so he and John could play speed. "Nothing much. Museums, lake swimming, hanging around the house. Our usual, really."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Katma said sweetly. Almost too sweetly, if Barry was picking it up right. "I know you were anxious about one thing going in, how did that work out?"

Hal's head snapped up and he looked at her, shocked. "Oh that, well, uh, you see it was sort of um... rocky at first but it's about half resolved now..."

Barry fought hard not to roll his eyes. Hal was good at playing dumb and panicked, but Barry was disappointed in himself. If this was how Katma had pulled his leg before, Barry was an idiot for not noticing. 

Katma raised an eyebrow. "Half-resolved? Which half? The-" she winked "half or the not-so fun half? Good resolved or bad resolved? I need details, Jordan."

"Woman, leave the poor guy alone," John cut in. "He's got enough to worry about either way without you bringing it up."

Hal dealt the cards and they started playing. Katma rounded on her boyfriend. "Woman? 'Woman?' Who told you you could talk to me that way, man? How would you like it if I said that to you? Man, leave him alone. There, how did that make you feel?"

"I'm sorry, Kat, I know you don't like that," John apologized robotically. Barry stifled another giggle. He didn't hang out with these guys that much, but he'd forgotten how angry Katma could get.

Before she could tell him off again, Jessica Cruz opened the door of their cabin. "There's a salad with craisins in the dining car! It's pretty tasty!"

They all stared at her. "Welcome back to you too, kid," Hal said. "I think I'll take you up on that salad."

The ride was fairly uneventful again while Hal was in the dining car and Barry read his book. Katma and John had continued the card games after Hal left and they mostly left Barry alone. He wasn't focusing very well on his book, though. He kept thinking about how great it would feel when the train stopped at Starling and he could finally hold Hal's hand. It had been a few hours since he'd touched Hal at all, even in passing, and he was starting to get antsy. He'd spent so long waiting to be with Hal, he decided he was a dumbass for making himself wait even longer while they played a trick on their friends.

Eventually, long after Barry had started in on his second book of Frankenstein, the train picked up Oliver and Dinah in Starling. Hal found them in the corridor and brought them to the right compartment, apparently having denied them any details of his trip the whole way from whichever door they'd come through to get on the train. Oliver was just finishing a story about Dinah's dad when they came into the cabin.

"And that's why he threatened to shoot me," Oliver said. Barry grinned at them and got up to give hugs. 

"This time," Dinah added. 

"Right, why he wanted to shoot me this time."

After getting hugs, Barry day back down but one seat away from where he had been to talk to John about transfiguration. Hal filed in behind him with John on his other side, and the other three were on the opposite bench. 

As he sat down, Hal gave Barry a look. This was it, whatever they did next would be the Reveal. Barry could hardly wait.

"Hal, could you pass me my book?" He said. "It's right behind you in my bag."

"Sure thing, babe," Hal said, reaching to get the book and passing it to him with a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks." The two of them looked up at the same time to see everyone's faces, and they were not disappointed.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Dinah yelled. "Are you f-u-c-k-i-n-g kidding me right now?!?"

"What?" Hal asked innocently.

Ollie spluttered a second before yelling at the same time as John, "you just kissed Barry!"

Hal looked at them, then pretended to realize what he'd done. "Oh yeah, I did." Barry pretended to go back to reading.

"Are you fucking joking," Dinah muttered.

"How did you not..." Katma whispered. "We've been here for hours! What the hell? How did we not notice? What?!?"

Barry shrugged, turning a page. "Bruce noticed."

"Oh, to hell with Bruce, he notices everything," Dinah exclaimed, throwing her hands into the air. "Tell me everything right now. I have a lot of money riding on this. When did it happen? How did it happen? Who kissed who?"

Hal laughed and took Barry's hand, signaling that they were done playing nonchalant. Barry happily put down his book. They told their friends everything about their holiday, right down to Hal pretending to be sick. Barry was surprised to hear that part, but overall they took turns relating their side of the events. When they were done, Ollie let out a groan and Dinah a big cheer.

"Pay up, bitch!" Dinah yelled. Hal burst out laughing and Barry giggled too. "Five for the day, five for the confession!"

"Yeah, yeah, drink it in," Ollie said, handing his girlfriend ten sickles. "But you still owe me two days' dessert for who-kissed-who."

"It was a lucky guess," Dinah argued.

"Yeah, but I was right," Ollie replied.

"Whatever, I'm still the one with the money."

Word quickly spread throughout the Hogwarts Express and by the time they disembarked, the entire class was cheering for Hal and Barry. Barry had never been more embarrassed in his life. Hal was loving it. Of course, Barry couldn't be upset with the situation. He had Hal's arm around him and the love of their friends behind him, and that's really all he wanted. Finally, Hal and Barry were together.


End file.
